so my mom left me and my sister home alone for the month so
You are living my dream.
one time when i was like 12 my dad wanted me to put a dvd in the dvd player and i was like ‘what do i get in return’ and he said ‘you can have half of the winnings of this stupid lotto ticket’ and he ended up winning 600,000 dollars and i was so pleased with myself. 300,000 dollars when youre 12 is pretty much like infinity dollars. he was so mad
Shit, man, $300,000 would be like infinity dollars to me now.
when my kids ask where babies come from im just gonna show them this gif
I AM DONE WITH TUMBLR. FUCKING DONE. BUY A HOUSE IN ALBERTA AND STAY IN IT FOREVER AND NEVER EVER COME OUT.
Oh look how the cute little babies just come tumbling out
So my cousin was in a gay pride parade and everything in her outfit and makeup was rainbow but she was wearing red contacts and while marching, a protester behind her yelled “You’re going straight to hell” and she turns around to face him with her fuCKING blood red eyes and she says “well duh, I got a kindom to run” and the protester nearly fucking passed out that is her legacy I want to be like her
i want a relationship but i want them to be like a friend to me, i dont want the relationship to be all about kissing, making out and sex i just wanna hang out with them, and go places, and just have fun wherever we go
This post is surreal because that is exactly how a healthy relationship should be yet we’re convinced this is a weird and unusual thing to ask of our partners.
making my way downtown oh my fucking god where am i